There are steps that cast our journeys from one experience to the next – not linearly or dramatically per se, but along a continuum of progress. Sometimes we feel like life fails us or as if we fail ourselves when we’re caught in a world unfamiliar and broken. Words and actions feel inappropriate – we are strangers in our own lives.
As the New Year approaches I’m reminded of the rich life I have known. I’m reacquainted with the familiar appreciation of my connections, shaped and confirmed by synchronicity. Once again transition appears with guided purpose and structure as I meet a whole new circle of caring friends, at a place called CAST.
Today I reflect on my roles, and the natural expectations that come with them. I am a social worker, a writer, and a sister: in all these roles I am committed to being present, receptive and trusting. At times I get caught up in the symbiotic moments I share with my clients, my audience, my brother… and I catapult myself into “doing good,” without taking the time to reacquaint myself with my own connection – with myself.
So just before another year passes, I am committed to examining myself – my inner walls- my different philosophies and ways of life. I’m hopeful and feel more authenticity – more presence – and more trust in the choices I make.
Once again doing well by speaking from my heart takes me to another point along my journey – as a daughter, a friend, a sober companion…
The underlying order of life resurfaces in its synchronicity. Just another New Year metaphor… a particular self-awareness from which it grows immeasurably richer as I continue to learn and cast away judgment.
My choices allow me to serve others – by doing what’s good. It feels good, practical, and meaningful – all at once. My life becomes sweeter and I’m reminded of the adage that we truly are only given what we can handle.
Written by: Erica MSW
Tags: Relapse Prevention